Pastoral Ministries

Respect Life Office

The choices we make determine the person we become.  Each of us has experiences in our past and present that make up who we are and forms how we look at life and how we deal with others.  When we are involved in helping others it is important to take a serious look at ourselves.  If we have deep hurts in our past that have not healed, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to be an effective helper to someone else.  We are all wounded healers who must, through God’s merciful love, heal our own wounds while trying to heal others.  Look at your past and present.  Are there situations or stresses where it will be difficult for you to be objective while listening to and advising another person who is suffering because of your own unresolved difficulties?

It may help you to do some self-reflection, prayer, discernment and journaling before making the decision to be a Gabriel Project Angel.  Does your prayer life or relationship with God needs strengthening?  Do you have some questions about your faith or the church?

Apart from contact with the Moms in crisis, there are other ways one can work with the Gabriel Project.  We must be spiritually and emotionally available to Mom to help her the way Christ wishes.  Clearing out the cluttered areas of our lives makes room for loving others.
 

Prayer And Worship

Prayer and Worship are at the center of our lives as Catholics. How is Jesus present in your life?  Are you living a life of grace by receiving the sacraments often, particularly Mass and Reconciliation? Do you spend time in prayer, both our beautiful Catholic prayers as well as those spontaneously spoken from your heart?  Have you taken the time to be silent and listen to what God is calling you to do in your life?  Do you go to Him in prayer during Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament or through reciting the Rosary?

Whatever you do to nurture your spiritual life you will need to intensify it.  As we take this journey with Moms in need, difficulties will arise and we will need the help only God can give.  If we keep our fountain of grace, given to us by the Holy Spirit, full, it will overflow naturally to others.  Remember, “Ask and you shall receive.”
 

Made In His Image

We Cannot Give What We Do Not Possess

As Mary visited Elizabeth after the Annunciation, Mary took with her the greatest treasure she had, Jesus in her womb.  The baby in Elizabeth’s womb leapt for joy!  As we visit Mom, we must remember the greatest treasure we have to share with her is Jesus Christ.  If we do not have Jesus in our hearts through the Holy Spirit how can we share Him with someone else?  He calls us to be aware of His presence in our lives, to share the love and joy and peace that His presence gives us. 

How is Jesus present in your life?  If He is not present in your life how can you bring Him to our Moms in need?  Maybe, in calling you to this apostolate, God is also offering you an opportunity to get to know Him better.  Remember that the Gabriel Project is Pastoral Care not just Social Work and you cannot bring God to others if you do not know Him yourself.
 

Privilege To Serve

• should keep accurate records of all she does with Mom and insure that the records are up to date and properly stored
   

• should always treat Mom and Mom’s story with complete confidence, only giving others details on a need to know basis e.g. referral to the hospital
   

• the angel must not give identifying details about Mom unless absolutely necessary
   

Motivations / Attitude

• a desire to give back to others because we have been given so much ourselves 
   

• a desire to right the tragic wrong of abortion
   

• healing from a past abortion, adoption, or miscarriage in our own lives
   

Whatever the reason, our primary motivation must be love and mercy for the mom who has come to us for help.  We are called to serve those most in need and to show them the unconditional love of Jesus Christ.  Loving and caring for Mom must always come before satisfying any other self-interested reasons.  Are you thinking primarily of “saving her baby”?  Do you want to show her where she went wrong?  Do you want to tell her what she should do?  We help Mom's baby by helping her.  We are not here to argue points on the life issues with her.  We are not Gabriel Angels to fulfill our own agenda.  We are not engaged in political activity.  Helping Mom is not a means to that end.

Without taking the time to show her how much you love and care about her, you are not serving her as Christ would.  How, then, is she to come to know the love of Christ through us?  As the cliché says, “They don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.”  Would you?
 

Practical Spiritual Preparation For A Visit

As you prepare to visit with Mom, always pray to the Holy Spirit that you will use His words and be constantly guided by Him in everything you do with her. Prepare yourself by saying a short prayer for her and her baby before each visit.  Be bold in your love for the Lord by sharing glimpses of Him through your words and actions.  Set aside personal concerns and be totally attentive to how Mom is feeling and doing.

Take something with you to leave with her that will remind her of our Lord and His love and concern for her (i.e., prayer card, rosary, book of meditations for moms, a picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe or Madonna of the Streets, a Bible).

Always be charitable in your speech about and to her.  We must serve her as we would serve Christ and we must try to serve her as Christ would.

We must understand the difference between our desires and our goals. 

• Our desire would be that the Moms we work with will have happy endings (two parent families, holiness, chastity, mental health, physical health, emotional health, spiritual health, steady job, all bills paid, etc.)
   

• Our goal is to serve each woman we meet with the love of Christ to the best of our ability.  We work towards our goals (that is something we have control over), but we pray about our desires and leave those in God’s hands (we do not have control over those things)

We must never try to manipulate or persuade a woman to make a decision that is not her own.  This is a serious violation of her integrity and dignity.  She is the one to make responsible decisions for her future.  Whatever she decides about the future of her pregnancy, there will be some tough times.  When staying up all night with a crying baby or grieving over the baby that someone else is raising, she will need strength to get through.  If you or someone else has made the decision for her (whether it be parenting or adoption), the resolve it takes to get through those tough times may not be there because she is blaming someone else for the decision. 

If she ultimately makes the tragic decision to go through with an abortion after you have given her all the information about the devastation it will cause in her life and offered her material, financial and emotional help; it is still her decision.  We are responsible for giving her all the help we can and for praying for God’s divine mercy and intervention on her behalf.

Always let her know that you will love her no matter what decision she makes.  Do not carry her guilt or feel that you have failed because she decided to say ‘no’ to God’s gift of life.  Remain faithfully in prayer for both mother and child.