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Foreward |
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In all circumstances the angel must accompany Mom.
There are certain services that Mom may need where Catholic
standards are not maintained. This is particularly
in the areas of sterilization, contraception and abortion.
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Obtaining WIC And
Other Benefits |
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All Moms applying for such benefits are routinely offered
contraceptive advice. Mom may think she must accept the
contraceptive advice to obtain her benefits. She may also be
ignorant of the effects of contraception on her body and spirit.
If Mom is delivered in a public or non-Catholic hospital and
particularly if she has more than three children, she will be
offered tubal ligation or contraceptives, particularly Depo-Provera
If Mom is battered and needs refuge, most women centers are
pro-abortion and in favor of sterilization, contraception and
divorce.
If Mom is raped and brought to a public or non Catholic hospital she
will routinely be given the morning after pill to induce abortion if
conception has taken place. She may not be fully informed about
the procedure or treatment.
If raped, Mom may take precautions to prevent conception from taking
place. However, once conception takes place, nothing may be done to
interfere with the pregnancy. (Gabriel Project Resource Manual)
Every state has a web page to access information on social services
available through the Department of Health, which includes details
about all the programs and benefits available to Mom and lists local
welfare offices by zip code. (Gabriel Project Resource Manual)
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CareNet And
Crisis Pregnancy
Centers |
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Most crisis pregnancy centers, whether independent or under the
CareNet umbrella are outreaches by Evangelical Christians. They ask
their volunteers to sign a statement of faith, which is not in
accord with Catholic teaching. Moms who are referred to CPC’s may
be proselytized. Care should be taken in contacting CPC’s for any
services including sonograms and pregnancy tests.
Make arrangements with and use the local Catholic Hospital system
for all medical services. Your diocese may have a Catholic
Pregnancy Care Agency or a Gabriel Project Life Center. (Gabriel
Project Resource Manual) You are not competent to provide medical
care.
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When Mom Is Abused |
This is NOT a service the Gabriel Project provides. Refer her to
the parish social Services. If she has been assaulted or
threatened tell her to call the Emergency Telephone Line 911.
Remember, most Women’s Centers which help battered women are
pro-abortion and in favor of contraception and divorce. Very often
Mom will refuse to press charges and go back to a violent
household. A Maternity Home or Maternity Shelter can offer Mom a
place of respite and care for her pregnancy until she can diffuse
her situation.
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When Mom Is A Minor |
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Many Dioceses have special Social Services for pregnant minors
(up to age 18 yrs) and it is often advisable to refer difficult
minor Moms to Catholic Charities or a Maternity Home.
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In many states it is not a crime for a 17 year old to run away, but it is a crime for
someone to harbor a minor who has run away. You
should immediately seek advice from your Pastor or Parish Social
Services or Catholic Charities. (Check your state laws.)
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It is important to obtain parental consent for a minor if you wish to
transport her, house her, and get medical care for
her. (Check your state laws.)
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It is a crime in many states not to report child abuse. (Check your state laws.)
(Gabriel Project Resource Manual)
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When A Minor Mom Is
Forced To Abort |
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If a minor believes she is being forced to have an abortion, by the
father of the child or her parents, she has a legal right to refuse
to have an abortion. She may leave home to meet with someone for
protection or advice. Meet Mom at the Church and involve your Pastor
in this situation. It is not a crime to give Mom advice. It is a
crime to take a minor from her home. This is kidnapping.
(Gabriel Project Resource Manual)
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Finding Support For
Mom |
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Ask her if anyone in her family supports her decision to keep her baby,
an aunt, grandmother, older sister, etc… If not, does she have a
friend who will take her in or to a shelter?
It is very important the Angel does everything to reconcile Mom with
her parents, husband or other family members. The pastor, her
friend's parents or the hospital social worker can talk to her
parents on her behalf. Often, parents of a pregnant minor need
time to accept this new reality. Time and prayer may be enough to
soften a parent’s resolve and accept their daughter’s pregnancy –
two to four weeks.
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What If The Abortion
Is Scheduled |
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Advise Mom to leave her home. This is a serious situation in
which the pastor must be involved. The Angel must always meet her
at the parish with the Pastor. Have Mom sign a notarized statement
stating she does not consent to an abortion. (Gabriel Project
Resource Manual ) Mom can tell the Angel the time and place of the
abortion. The Angel can meet her at the Abortion Site with the sworn
affidavit, which will discourage the clinic from performing the
abortion. Under no circumstances will the Angel pick the minor up
from her home and take her away. This is kidnapping.
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When A Minor Becomes
A Runaway |
If a minor has already left home of her own free will and is living
on the street or staying with friends, Mom is a runaway. You
may be able to convince Mom to talk to her parents with you, the
Pastor or a member of the Social Service about her pregnancy. Often,
the resistance parents show toward their daughter can be ameliorated
when another adult with good and practical information steps in.
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Family Reconciliation |
The most desirable outcome is to reconcile the family. Arrangements
must be made for follow up family counseling with the local parish
priest and appropriate Catholic family counseling agency. Although
he has no legal rights, it is important to be sensitive to the
father of the unborn child and his family, and include them in the
reconciliation process.
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When Mom Speaks Only
Spanish |
Spanish speaking angels must be available to work with Spanish
speaking Moms or a Spanish speaking volunteer must be available to
translate and make it possible for the Angel to serve Mom. Spanish
materials must also be available for Mom. Be sensitive to the fact
that the Hispanic culture has a view and understanding of life and
family that is different from those of us born in the United
States. Children are considered a national treasure in Mexico. The
Office of Hispanic Ministry in your Diocese can be of great
assistance. (Gabriel Project Resource Manual)
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When Mom Wants An
Abortion |
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This is a very difficult situation for most Gabriel Angels and
volunteers. Don’t panic, keep your wits about you, take a deep
breath and. prayerfully reflect on your role as the heart, hands,
eyes and ears of God to Mom.
Reach out in love to help her. Your tone of voice and
way of talking to her tell her much more about you than anything you
can say does. She will judge whether you are loving and
trustworthy by your attitude and way of behaving towards her.
Let her know how much you want to help her and all the ways that you
can help her. Be gentle and accepting. (see Gabriel Resource Manual)
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What About Adoption |
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What is adoption?
Adoption is the birth Mother’s choice to permanently and
legally entrust her child to the care of someone else. Mom may
choose to remain involved in her birth-child’s life, but the
adoptive couple becomes the child’s parents.
What types of adoption does the Gabriel Project Support?
The local Catholic Adoption Agency, usually Catholic
Charities, must handle all adoptions.
If a Catholic Agency is not available, remember Adoption is big
business with only one baby available for every 40 couples who want to adopt.
If Mom needs residential care, ensure the home will not pressure her
to adopt. Working with a Catholic Agency prevents Mom being abused and financially exploited
(see Gabriel Resource Manual). .
The Gabriel Project is not an adoption agency
and must
NEVER be
involved in private adoptions. It may be considered illegal in
some States, and adoptions are beyond the competency of the Gabriel
Project.
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Working With Mom’s
Support System |
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Help Mom identify her support system and encourage her to
reestablish contact with her family, friends, church, and
co-workers. Encourage Mom to change her life by avoiding bad
companions, disordered environments and ways of life that are
unhealthy. Help her seek companionship and friends who are life
giving. Encourage Mom to come to know God, her Father in heaven and
His only beloved son, Jesus Christ, her spiritual support. Always
invite Mom to come to church with you.
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Developing A
Relationship With Mary |
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Give Mom a holy card or picture of Mary and remind her that Mary
once was an unwed mother who trusted that all things were possible
with God. The image of Our Lady of Guadalupe may be especially
meaningful to Mom, as Mary is 8 months pregnant in this image.
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When Mom Needs A
Place To Stay |
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Housing is a difficult issue in any city, therefore, Mom's
first and best resources are her family and friends. Homelessness
is not a healthy situation for mother or her unborn child. Identify places that provide a home or shelter to expectant mothers,
specifically those with a Catholic identity that you can use in the
event a Mom needs a place to stay. In general, Gabriel Angels
should not provide housing to Moms (see Gabriel Resource Manual)
Many good hearted families are open to having
a Mom come into their home to live until her circumstances improve
or until the baby is born. These are called Shepherding Homes.
Great caution must be used in screening a Mom before allowing a
family to take her into their home. A Mom who is unstable or
dysfunctional could be very disruptive to a peaceful home. A loving
environment can have a positive effect on Mom.
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When Mom Needs
Monetary Assistance |
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If Mom asks for monetary assistance, the Angel must inquire what the
monies are needed for and why. Remember, the Gabriel Project
offers immediate and practical help, not monetary assistance
Fulfilling a monetary request means approaching parish
organizations, such as Parish Social Ministry, St. Vincent de Paul,
and the Knights of Columbus or Catholic Daughters for help.
Under no circumstances will the Angel hand cash to Mom. The
Angel must mail or deliver a check to the debtor with the check made
out to the debtor on Mom’s behalf.
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